ELLIE KILDUNNE has opened up about her struggle with body dysmorphia, revealing how the pressures of elite sport and the isolation of lockdown led her into disordered eating and unhealthy weight loss.
The England rugby star, who played a key role in the Red Roses’ Rugby World Cup victory last year, said her difficulties developed during the coronavirus lockdown when normal training structures disappeared.
Kildunne scored five tries during the tournament, including a standout solo effort in front of a packed stadium at Allianz Stadium in the final against Canada. However, she said life away from competition brought a different kind of challenge.
She explained that elite sport often revolves around control—tracking performance data, managing weight, and meeting physical targets. When that structure was removed during lockdown, she struggled to find balance.
“Once that was taken away, I tried to find control elsewhere,” she said.
During that period, Kildunne was part of Great Britain’s sevens squad preparing for the Olympic Games, which were later postponed. Without access to full training facilities and team support, she focused heavily on running and performance metrics while reducing her food intake.
She described how her relationship with food became unhealthy, often exercising to “earn” meals and restricting her eating while trying to maintain control over her body.
